Yes, I said it. It's true! I haven't really had sex in over a year and now it's starting to hit me. I will admit that I had a little bit of sex the night of Aug. 16, 2008 but I didn't have an orgasm so I still feel a build up from over 12 months of abstinence.
Before a few weeks ago, the last man I was with was this guy/boyfriend/lover...whatever you call it whom I met through myspace and he turned out to be a LOSER. lol. I'm not bitter about it. I wish him nothing but the best. We all run into sour apples from time to time.
Anyway, we ended our relationship after about 5 or 6 months of dating. Something like that. Then a few months later, I lost my job, had no money, my life seemed stagnated so I fell into a deep depression. Trust me, it had nothing to do with him. In the past, I would get all panicky and fearful when I didn't have financial stability but I'm trying to react differently now.
Since I was depressed, I stayed at home in a shell and men were the farthest thing from my mind. It was just me and God. More months went by then in the middle of this year, I started to come out of my depression. I got a renewed sense of faith and returned fervently on my passionate mission with my career.
Now that I'm happy, vivacious and bubbly again, men are all on me like bees to honey and I'm loving it! lol Foreal. I am such a flirt right now. I know why. It's because I haven't had any in a long, long, while and plus my usual nature is a little on the flirty side. Times like this, it becomes more magnified..
Naturally, I can't do it with all these men approaching me. Especially not for free! Just joking...really, I'm kidding. But you know I can't, it's too risky. So I just flirt and have fun then call it a day.
Now back to this rendezvous I had a few weeks ago. I was on here promoting the Youth Village event I was producing at the African Marketplace. I'd been posting bulletins about it for weeks. Anyway, one of my myspace friends sent me a message asking me for my number because he wanted to discuss some business since I was having Al B. Sure's son perform on my stage & he was going to have Al B. Sure himself sing on some kind of cruise he's involved with.
I saw the Al B. connection and sent him my number. He called and we talked for awhile. He had a very strong, African accent so it was hard to understand some things he was saying. Since I was focused in business mode, I tried to sell him on getting a booth at the event since he was involved in a travel agency business. In turn, he tried to sell me on getting involved with his business which is a MLM type of travel agency.
No offense to the brother or anyone else involved in multi-level marketing but that's not my thing. I never did and probably never will like this type of network marketing. So the first night on the phone, we both were pushy, trying to sell to each other.
The next day, he called and asked if I had a chance to check out his website. I told him no because I was swamped with working and producing the event at the same time. We continued talking for awhile and it seemed to me as if he was trying to flirt here and there. A short while later, we got off the phone.
On the third day, he was texting me and called me to buy this motivational book, Think & Grow Rich because he said it would help me in my business endeavors. He seemed very sharp, smart, encouraging, funny, and very pushy.
Now, I didn't recall ever checking out his myspace page. Sometimes, not too often but sometimes I'll accept a friend request without checking the profile if I'm busy or something. I thought to myself that I should look at his profile to see who I've been talking to.
I clicked on his profile and was surprised. Over the phone, my imagination had created him to be an older, African man who probably wasn't very physically attractive. I know that wasn't cool but I'm keeping it real. Honestly, not all my lovers have been extremely good looking. They have varied in weight, height, race, age to a certain extent, and careers. I'm attracted to a person for various reasons and it's not always the outer appearance. But everyone admires beauty and I have eyes just like men do.
Especially since I'm long overdue, my eyes are about to pop out of my head admiring good-looking men. lol So anyway, I finally looked at this man's profile. He had a body and lips like L.L. Cool Jay (he also kept licking them like LL) and a face that was a cross between P. Diddy and Taye Diggs. Well, as you can imagine...I was like, "Daaaaamn!!! What did the Lord just bless me with? Baby looks sooooo yummy!" (slapping wrist) Bad girl, bad girl. hahahahahah
After I carefully reviewed his profile, admiring his rippling, chocolate muscles and very handsome, chiseled face, I decided to reach out to call him. I seemed to have found a moment in my busy schedule to call him for once. lol My tone on the phone totally changed. It was less business and alot more sultry.
We hit it off. We laughed, joked and talked about achieving our heart's desires. I found out that he was only 25 and here I am almost 40! Now...I make it a practice not to date men too much younger than me. They're usually in the 30's to 50's age bracket. Anyway, next thing I know, we're flirting on the phone & he makes a joke about us being like the movie, "How Stella Got Her Groove Back". Of course, me being the mature woman who runs into this young, hot, hard-bodied hunk of a man. lol We ended our convo with him coming down to the African Marketplace on Aug. 16.
The 16th arrives, he showed up like he said he would and hung out with me as I ran around managing the youth area. He was really nice and we vibed with each other. Once the event was over for the evening, he even helped me clean the area, stack chairs, etc. How sweet, awwwww. :)
By the end of the day, I was tired, exhausted. Before he left, my sexy, African friend invited me to hang out with him to go listen to some jazz. I agreed to meet him later and went home to take a shower and change clothes. That evening, I drove to his house so we could go to the jazz spot. When I walked in, I sat on his couch so I could chill for a minute. He went to the kitchen to make me a plate of African food since I hadn't eaten all day at the event.
His big screen TV was on playing the DVD of his MLM travel company. lol He came out the kitchen, handing me the plate of food. I took a few bites but I didn't have much of an appetite so I set it down. He sat next to me on the couch, telling me how great the company is, how I can make all this extra money, etc. Then I asked him for a glass of wine so I could continue to relax. He didn't have any so we drove to the store to get some. We returned to the couch as I slowly sipped on a glass of wine while watching the DVD with him.
Then next thing I know, we just started kissing each other and things got real heated. We went to his bedroom, got undressed and you know the rest of the "protected" story. I have to censor this. Everything was pretty passionate. We went on for awhile but I was so doggone tired and maybe the wine hit me but I didn't even "reach the peak." I could tell it wasn't going to happen that night. I was waaaayyyy too tired. Mannnn!!!!!!!!!!! A whole year without sex, Nina's back to herself and I didn't get to go out with a bang. Oh the misery, oh the sorrow. hahahaha. Oh well, I figured I'd take a rain check for another day when I have much more energy.
So a few days later, I call him up to see if he wanted me to come over on Friday. I knew this was going to be nothing serious primarily because of the age difference but I'm like hey if I'm going to do this as a temporary thing...then why not do it with some eye candy that's youthful yet mature, big, handsome and strong. Shoot, I can be Mariah for a minute or Demi Moore! hahaha
Anyway back to the story, he brings up something about wanting to do business with me and be my friend. And that most of the women he networks with winds up wanting to be with him physically. He said he wasn't ready for anything more than being friends and having fun. I assured him that I wasn't looking for anything else between us but to just have fun. I also told him, I know how he feels because I go through the same thing with men wanting to sleep with me, even though I'm a smart, talented, business woman. So, he said cool and he'd see me on Friday. I was really looking forward to it.
The next evening, he called and said he needed to talk to me. He said he wanted to REALLY just be platonic friends and work together on a business level only. Honestly, I was disappointed because I wanted to have my basic needs fulfilled but it wasn't an issue, it was really no big deal to me. Everyone, whether you're a man, woman, whatever...gets rejected and/or accepted. That's just a part of life. So I turned off my hot-a-meter and turned my emotions back to a business mindset. It was fun while it lasted though. lol
The end of the story is that he called me a few days later to go to one of those MLM meetings after I got off work. I did go with an open mind to see what this program is all about that he just raves over so much. I heard their presentation and like my attitude at all the other presentations I've attended over the years, NOT INTERESTED! At the break, I politely told him, "I told you before that I am not interested in pyramids, MLM's, whatever you call it. It's just not for me. I wish you much success in this but I'm not the one. Now I have to go and finish working on this event."
His smiles & demeanor suddenly changed. His smile started to jerk or shake slightly into a frown. I observed his reaction to rejection but again, that's a part of life. What can you do but move on?
I didn't reject him because it was about tit for tat. Whether we kicked it for a few months or not, I still wouldn't have been into MLM. I doubt I ever will. Since I left the meeting that night, I haven't heard from him since. He's still on my friends list though. He may delete me if he reads this but all I do is tell the truth.
So yes, I'm hot right now but I'm trying to keep cool and trying hard not to go too crazy! LOL
